Breaking the Silence: Moving Beyond Religious Speak for True Emotional Connection

As an ordained minister and Gay, who identifies as Christian and believes in Christ, I choose not to engage in what is commonly referred to as "religious speak." I'll share about my faith but not to proselytize or to prove my knowledge, unless asked. While faith is a vital part of my life, I believe that relying on religious language, like responding "Blessed!" to a greeting, can often be the least effective way to communicate, especially, our true emotions. This point of view evolved over time from experiencing interactions with others of various backgrounds, ideas, and beliefs. Wearing my "Christian" badge of honor on my sleeve is truly annoying, period! We are all human! Get over it!

Using religious phrases and terminology can sometimes serve as a barrier, preventing us from genuinely expressing how we feel. It can become a form of avoidance, where we use familiar religious language to gloss over or escape from confronting our deeper, more uncomfortable emotions. This kind of speech might provide temporary relief or a sense of comfort, but it doesn't necessarily lead to meaningful communication or understanding.

However, it's important to clarify that avoiding religious speak does not mean refraining from using biblical scripture altogether. Scripture is a profound source of wisdom, guidance, and comfort. It is meant to be used for building a deeper relationship with God through Christ, with the aid and assistance of the Holy Spirit. Scripture nurtures our soul, guides our steps, and helps us grow in our faith. It should be used in a way that uplifts, encourages, and provides genuine insight, rather than as a tool for judgment or to shut down conversations.

True communication involves being vulnerable and authentic, not hiding behind religious language that can sometimes obscure the reality of our experiences. It means sharing our real thoughts and emotions, even when they are raw or difficult to articulate. In this way, we can build genuine connections, foster understanding, and promote healing that is grounded in the reality of our lived experiences rather than in scripted responses.

When we approach conversations with an open heart, using scripture to provide comfort and insight rather than as a means to control or judge, we honor the true spirit of the teachings. Scripture is meant to bring us closer to God, to guide us in love and truth, and to lead us in the way of righteousness. By focusing on building that relationship with God and with others, we can create a more compassionate and understanding world, reflecting the love and grace that is central to the Christian faith.

Scriptures to nurture our heart and soul:

The idea of moving beyond superficial language to genuine, heartfelt communication is supported by several passages in the Bible that emphasize sincerity, truthfulness, and the importance of the heart’s condition over outward appearances. Here are a few scriptures that align with this concept:

1. Matthew 15:8 (NIV):

   “These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me.”

   • This verse highlights the difference between outward expressions of faith and the true condition of the heart, suggesting that God values genuine sincerity over mere words.

2. James 1:26 (NIV):

   “Those who consider themselves religious and yet do not keep a tight rein on their tongues deceive themselves, and their religion is worthless.”

   • This verse stresses the importance of how we use our words and the need for our speech to reflect our true beliefs and values.

3. 1 Samuel 16:7 (NIV):

   “The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”

   • This passage reinforces that God values the authenticity and sincerity of the heart more than outward displays or appearances, including religious speak.

4. Psalm 51:6 (NIV):

   “Surely you desire truth in the inner parts; you teach me wisdom in the inmost place.”

   • This scripture emphasizes God’s desire for truth and authenticity from within, rather than external appearances or words.

5. Matthew 6:7 (NIV):

   “And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words.”

   • Here, Jesus teaches that it’s not about the quantity or complexity of words, but the sincerity of the heart behind the prayer.

These verses collectively emphasize the importance of sincerity, truth, and authenticity in our speech and interactions, aligning well with the idea of avoiding superficial religious language and fostering genuine emotional communication.

The Bible also provides clear guidance on how Scripture should be used, emphasizing its role in teaching, guiding, correcting, and equipping believers for righteous living. Here are several key passages that explain the purpose and use of Scripture:

1. 2 Timothy 3:16-17 (NIV):

   “All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.”

   • This passage highlights that Scripture is inspired by God and serves multiple purposes: teaching us truth, rebuking us when we’re wrong, correcting our errors, and training us in righteous living. It aims to equip believers to carry out God’s work.

2. Psalm 119:105 (NIV):

   “Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path.”

   • Here, Scripture is described as a source of guidance, illuminating the path and helping believers navigate their lives according to God’s will.

3. Romans 15:4 (NIV):

   “For everything that was written in the past was written to teach us, so that through the endurance taught in the Scriptures and the encouragement they provide we might have hope.”

   • This verse indicates that Scripture is meant to teach and encourage, providing believers with hope and endurance in their faith.

4. Hebrews 4:12 (NIV):

   “For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.”

   • Scripture is described as powerful and discerning, able to reach into the depths of our being to reveal and judge our thoughts and attitudes, emphasizing its role in personal introspection and spiritual growth.

5. Joshua 1:8 (NIV):

   “Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful.”

   • This verse emphasizes the importance of continuously engaging with Scripture, meditating on it, and applying it to one’s life to live according to God’s instructions and experience success and prosperity.

6. Colossians 3:16 (NIV):

   “Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts.”

   • This passage encourages believers to use Scripture to teach and admonish one another, suggesting that it should permeate their interactions, leading to wisdom and mutual edification.

These passages collectively show that Scripture is intended to be a guide for living, a source of wisdom and encouragement, a tool for teaching and correcting, and a means of fostering spiritual growth and maturity. It is to be used thoughtfully and reverently to align believers with God’s will and to strengthen their faith. Not used to judge others or to create a groupthink tank of exclusion but to bring us into a mindful closeness with God, our Heavenly Father (Parent).